Building a Life: Sex & Relationships

The human being is both a sexual and a social animal. Deprived of sexual contact or a sense of social value, most of us will start to go loopy pretty quick. I’ve already written about the value to be found in a deliberate study of the art of seduction, so I won’t repeat myself here. What I’d like to discuss today is the importance of developing real and lasting relationships.

Those of us born into the great western cities of the modern age face a number of strange psychological dilemmas. We are offered an almost infinite choice of profession and, perhaps as a result, often find ourselves paralyzed with indecision about our roles in society. We live surrounded by people, and yet often we feel disconnected and very much alone. Those who earn some mastery of the art of seduction will eventually learn that sex alone is not enough to sustain the human heart. We need sex, yes, but we also need community, family and love.

To master this element requires an ongoing study of communication skills, conflict management, ethics and reciprocity. It also requires a high degree of awareness of who you are, who you want to be, who you want to include in your life and who you want to keep out. You need to build a tribe around yourself because, without one, all the wealth and good health in the world seem meaningless.

In the first post of this series, I quoted the meaning of life as “Survival and Reproduction”. Those of us who already have children already know how true the second part of that equation is. For those of you who don’t have kids, you should try it someday. You may find, as I have, a whole new sense of connection to your family…past, present and future.

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4 thoughts on “Building a Life: Sex & Relationships

  1. “For those of you who don’t have kids, you should try it someday. You may find, as I have, a whole new sense of connection to your family…past, present and future.”

    True. And it’s also totally heathen. Kin, loyalty, sharing. I also think that the joy of having a child and seeing how it grows up is beyond comparison. However, people should only “try it”, if they are ready to sacrifice many of their freedoms. And freedom, for libertarians like us, Clint :-), is paramount, isn’t it?

    For some individualists, magicians and artists it’s better to have no children… ;)

  2. Freedom from external interference is paramount. Freedom from personal reponsibilty is an impossibility.

    So for some alcoholics, drug addicts and psychopaths, it may be better not to have children.

  3. A perfect description of Aleister Crowley. :-) Some of his children died, because the prophet had more important things to do than caring for his children…

    Anyway, anyhow, I totally agree that life is better and more beautiful with community, family and love. We see the world differently with the eyes of our children.

  4. Whenever my husband was frustrated with people in his world he’d come home to us and say “I am so glad I made my own people”.

    Our family just keeps growing. First we had children. Then the children had friends that basically moved in on and off through their high school and now college years. Then the children and the friends hooked up with serious partners and brought them to our home too.

    We just had a winter finding and sumbel a few weeks ago and it was mobbed with kin, kith and fun, and all because my husband wanted to make his own people. Hail!

    @

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